[Image: Rakshinda Mujeeb And Baby Azlan]
It’s a 9am flight from Dubai to Karachi and she stepped on the plane with her cute little baby boy, air plane crew welcomed her and the baby with a wide smile and just when the pilot announced takeoff; her baby started crying inconsolably. She’s playing a cartoon on the smartphone, tried feeding him by a bottle, held him tight and kissed his forehead but nothing seems to work. This woman is flustered! All the passengers are giving her the odd stare and she’s just waiting for the seat belt sign to turn off so she can to stand off her seat and walk the baby to calm him down.
This woman is going through a challenging phase and I can say this for sure because it was me. I am a first-time mother to a handsome boy who is 8 months old now. When my baby was a month old, I was told that his constant crying is “colic”, as parents, I and my partner were relieved that we have a name for the problem but the solution was unknown. We tried different things but the only thing that helped was endless patience. We finally waved goodbye to colic at his 6-month birthday only to say welcome colic’s ugly sister “teething”.
This time I was sure that I am going to be more patient but I just kept losing sanity. The burden of caring for a newborn is so under-rated, I was told by older relatives after the birth of my boy “You and baby will adjust after 40 days, nothing to worry” then they told me “It will just take 3 months for you and your baby to adjust to the environment”. Later the same people said “At the age of 6 months a baby becomes more stable so life will be easier” and this is still going on.
Nobody tells you the truth because the truth is uncertain. Every baby is different and life as a mother bashes you, trashes you, tests your temperament, makes you feel loved like never before but it can’t be described in words and only you will remain witness to it.
As a mother, I strongly feel that there are hundreds of tasks we achieve in a day but at the end when we’re going to bed, it’s always the undone chores that haunt our heads.
Put these dark feelings aside and no matter how poor you think you are as a mother, you should know that you’re doing your best and giving your 100%. Their nails will re-grow faster than your upper lips, they will scratch themselves no matter how many times you put those mittens on, they will hurt themselves with a toy and they will fall and bounce back but the most important thing is that you should be there with them to help them grow and feel loved because being a mother is not a privilege; it’s a responsibility that you are bound to succeed at.
I remember calling my father and saying “I can’t do this, it’s so difficult. I don’t even get to wash my face all day” and he calmly replied “You can do this because God knew you had the potential or else He wouldn’t have made you a mother.”
This article is contributed by Rakshinda Mujeeb